Lately, I’ve been feeling that my friends are neglecting me. I know or at least hope that it isn’t true, but that’s how I feel and I don’t know how to express it to them or even tell them. I lived with them for three years now because we all live away from home and rented an apartment together. There are ten of us total living together. And I just got a new roommate recently because my old roommate transfer. I know that one i my roommate mentioned that she didn’t like my new roommate for no particular reasons, but I just ignored it since I like my new roommate. And plus, I already told them that I’m going to get a new roommate because she was looking for a place to live. As of right now they’re all mutual and my roommate is a good person. And we’re both very quiet so it’s kind of awkward in our room sometimes.
One of our friends live close by so she visits often as well. Lately, they’ve been going out and doing stuff together. I wouldn’t know unless they mentioned about it. And I know that maybe there is no use in asking if they already knew I would reject them. However, it’s not like I’m going to reject them all the time and it’s nice to know where they are going even if I don’t go so that I don’t have to worry about them being gone all day/evening.
Even when we sit around together and just chill to talk I would still feel a little not left out. For example, one of them would laugh at something funny on Facebook, Snapchat, Internet in general and she would passed her phone around to let everyone else sees except for me even thought I’m sitting right across of her. And then moments later she would ask me about it and I have no clue because I didn’t get to see it, but she would be like “Why didn’t you look at it. Here let me show it to you again.” I know it’s nothing to be upset over about, but I tried to look at earlier and it just didn’t happened. And then there would be times when they just don’t purposely show it to me.
Then there are also times when I’m in the middle of talking and someone would just cut right in. I mean I have nothing against it, but it’s usually when I’m in the middle of discussing important matter with my personal life looking for advice. And of course I would just go silent after they cut in, but once it’s a happy mood you don’t want to turn it back to a somber atmosphere.
I also feel like sometimes I don’t get respected. And it’s usually with just one particular friend since she usually tag along when I go grocery shopping. And it’s always when I’m shopping for food to make lunch or dinner for my relatives or parents when they come to visit me. While I’m looking for food she’s pointing stuff out like why don’t you just make hamburgers, or buy lasagna. Well, first of all we don’t eat those stuff. In fact, I’m Chinese and our main dish is rice. I wouldn’t be upset if she didn’t acted like that even after I told her.
And especially when we go to the mall I would always end up not buying anything. Unless, it’s just me and Kristen who used to be my roommate for two years, but now we’re suitemates. That’s because I usually follow them to the store they want to go to. And when I tell them I’m going to go to another store for a while they’re like let’s go together. Of course, I’ll wait and we all go but then they would just look around quickly and want to leave. So, I won’t even have the chance to try on a shirt or stay longer. And there are times when I suggest going to a certain store but they’re just like no and make excuse. I mean I don’t like the stores they go to but I go and stay with them until they’re ready to leave. So, why can’t they do the same for me?
Then there are times when I get back from class or work and I’m really hungry. I would text them if they want to grab something for dinner, but they have already went out. So, I go by myself and I do get upset because it doesn’t hurt to text me so that I don’t have to waste my time waiting for five minutes to get a response.