365 Days Journaling: Letting Go

Credit: lettinggoquotesnizya.blogspot.com

We all have a bottle inside each of us that we keep our feelings and words inside. And that bottle works like prescription bottles that are and never will be opened. We bottled up anger, frustration, regrets, sadness, and words that we always wanted to say but never did say. Sometimes we bottled up too much that we end up venting it all out onto a person that we never meant to hurt. Practically, even when we think we had let go, we actually still hold onto it.

So, you’re probably thinking how do one appropriately let go of something? There is no right way of letting that something goes, but the wrong way to do it is taking it out on an innocent person and then not apologizing. In which, I myself am a suspect of using the latter method and that just makes me feel much worse not to mention even making me feel a little bit stupid for not being able to control my anger. And, that’s exactly how that bottle inside of us works, once it’s full it explode no matter how hard you try to keep the lid on.

We all make mistakes that we regret, bad decisions that we let it happen to long or too often that cannot be fixed immediately, And, of course, people are sometimes walking in and out on us. When all that happened, or just one, some of us don’t know how to cope with it. We write it down hoping to feel better, talk to a friend or family member, go clubbing to relieve it, and probably spend hours or days crying about it asking why we chose what we did or why is it always happening to us and not others. Just when we think we finally had move on we’re back to square zero.

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This past year I chose a decision, one that I’d rather not say because I don’t have too, that have been holding me back. And each day I kept asking why I did that to myself. I even tried writing myself a letter for reassurance, but that didn’t work for long because my worries came back. It’s like a nightmare. So, I realized that the only way to make my nightmare go away is to actually take action instead of just talking about it. Of course, there are other things that keep refilling my bottle like parent pressure or to much naggings from them. And when my parents are involved it makes me have a much harder time to vent it all out. Instead, I just scream but not just anywhere. Once a month I take a trip to the mountain and just scream everything out. Of course, that may sound  crazy to you, but it works for me. Plus, I make sure to go early in the morning to see the sunrise as well. And of course, time heals everything.

For some people, when they let go fo something or someone they like to do more, like haircut, new hair color, burn something of the past to move on, or maybe change from flats to killer heel. Okay, maybe  not killer heels, but some sort of heel to feel more dignified and stand taller. It’s all a processed of rebuilding yourself and re-finding that confidence. Once you do, it’s okay to not look back EVER because more than likely you’re never going back.

And you know, our innate behaviors doesn’t tell us to let go instead we had to learn about letting go of someone, something, feelings, etc. It is one lesson in life that is quite valuable, because if we don’t learn to move on or let go of the past then the past will always hold on to us. It’s like we’re trapped in that time period and unable to get out.

Credit: Gallery4share.com

Maybe there is something inside of you that has been bothering you for quite some time and you haven’t faced it. Maybe because you’re afraid, I know am. And, sometimes I also know that I’m ready to face the consequences to handle the truth that I’ll be alone or that I’ll have start over again. There is no such thing as “I’m ready” or “I’m not ready” you just have to trust your guts and do it.  However, once you let go something more meaningful will walk in. It could be someone who appreciates you more, a second opportunity at education or work,  or the just the simple feeling of getting a heavy load off your shoulders.

When you are “ready” to let go and when you chose to do so, another you are born. Each and every day we all live in the past, the present, and the future; traveling through time. It all depends on how we choose to live the moment. I want to live every day without hanging onto past mistakes, regrets and I do so by taking small actions at a time.  Actions I know that can build a stronger me and better me, actions that I know won’t put me back in the same situation. Letting go of something doesn’t mean you’re scared or weak, it just means that you want to be stronger.

Credit: Huffingtonpost.com

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